FACADE STAGEPLAY
Thu Apr 08 17 33 04 2010

GRACE
Trip, when are you going to get rid of this?

TRIP
What, Grace... this?

GRACE
Yes, you know how I feel about it --

TRIP
I know I know I'll do it right now, alright?!

(Matt knocks on the front door.)

(Matt knocks on the front door.)

GRACE
You know -- (interrupted)

TRIP
Uhp, he's here!

GRACE
What?! You said he's coming an hour from now!

TRIP
No, he's supposed to be here now!

GRACE
Trip...!

(Trip opens the front door.)

MATT
what's up fucker

TRIP
Matt!!

TRIP
Ah I'm so happy you could make it! -- (interrupted)

MATT
unhand me, fool

(Trip closes the front door.)

TRIP
Uh...

TRIP
Well, anyway... why don't you come in...

TRIP
Uh, I'll -- I'll go get Grace...

MATT
where's grace

GRACE
No, no, here we are!

MATT
what's up

GRACE
Oh, ha ha... things are good. -- (interrupted)

MATT
hi jason

GRACE
H-mmm (happy smile sound)

GRACE
By the way, you look wonderful!

GRACE
Well, come on in, make yourself at home!

MATT
hi jane

GRACE
hmmm Matt, seeing -- (interrupted)

MATT
i like your top, jane

GRACE
Oh! huh... -- (interrupted)

TRIP
Matt, are you -- are you leaving the room?

MATT
hey can i use your phone quickly?

TRIP
(little sigh) Anyway... I can't remember what we were talking about...

TRIP
Ah! Matt, -- (interrupted)

MATT
we were talking about panda bears

GRACE
Wait...

GRACE
You think I'm...

GRACE
communicative...

TRIP
Ho ho ho, ha, heh you're -- you're really joking around tonight, aren't you, ha ha ha...

MATT
when did i ever say that?

GRACE
Ha, yeah, ha ha...

TRIP
Ha ha, heh, never afraid to say anything that pops into your mind, ha heh heh... -- (interrupted)

(MATT comforts trip.)

MATT
it's alright man

TRIP
So! Drinks!

MATT
i'm here for you

TRIP
I want to fix you something special.

TRIP
How does a martini sound?

TRIP
Uh, well, you know what, I'm just going to make you a martini.

MATT
yeah let's get plastered

GRACE
Matt, I think Trip is pressuring you too much... how about just a simple glass of white wine?

MATT
sure whatever

GRACE
Okay, good!

TRIP
Yeah, that's fine...

MATT
i just want booze, really

TRIP
Oh, yeah, you know, I think I should fix you a real drink in not too long...

TRIP
So, anyhow...

TRIP
I keep the bar fully stocked, so we can do it another time.

GRACE
Oh, do you like those sculptures? I used to be so into, uh, collecting them...

TRIP
Into them? You love your sculptures so much I'm not even allowed to touch them! -- (interrupted)

MATT
these scuptures look like vomit

GRACE
If that's how you feel... (annoyed sigh)

TRIP
In terms of drinks...

TRIP
Grace, I know what you want, but I'll ask anyway... what would you like to drink?

GRACE
I'm happy to just have what our guest is having.

TRIP
Fine.

MATT
i want vodka

(MATT picks up the brass bull.)

TRIP
Oh, that brass bull, I love that, isn't that cool? It's a business gift --

GRACE
Trip, I've asked you to do something with that bull,

(MATT puts down the brass bull.)

TRIP
I know, alright, I'll get rid of it later, geez, heh, heh, -- (interrupted)

MATT
incorporate this brass bull into my

GRACE
Dammit, Trip, you know I can't stand the sight of that goddamn bull, I want it out of -- -- (interrupted)

MATT
drink

(MATT picks up a martini glass 1.)

GRACE
Yeah, ha, maybe you can give me your honest opinion about where I went wrong with my new decorating, uhh...

(MATT puts down a martini glass 1.)

GRACE
(little sigh)

TRIP
Oh, Grace, no, no, h -- how can you say that? -- (interrupted)

MATT
ONE BRASS BULL PLEASE

TRIP
Goddamn, what you are you hinting at? I'm getting really sick of it.

MATT
delicious

GRACE
Trip! What are you --

(MATT picks up a Grace's drink.)

TRIP
Look I'll leave you two to keep chatting about love and marriage and all that good shit.

GRACE
What? Where are you going?

(MATT sips his Grace's drink.)

TRIP
I'm just going to get something from the kitchen.

MATT
don't say shit

MATT
shit is a bad word

(MATT sips his Grace's drink.)

GRACE
(frustrated sigh)

(MATT sips his Grace's drink.)

(MATT sips his Grace's drink.)

GRACE
Um, Trip, if -- if you have a second, could you --

MATT
that guy sure is a pussy, huh jane

(MATT sips his Grace's drink.)

(MATT puts down a Grace's drink.)

GRACE
Matt, what the hell is going on with you tonight?

(MATT picks up a Grace's drink.)

TRIP
Hey, what's going on in there?

MATT
i'm drunk

GRACE
I just don't understand where this is coming from!

MATT
i'm out of my head plastered

TRIP
You know what, Matt, that's it, you need to leave.

MATT
WAIT NO

(Trip opens the front door.)

TRIP
We'll be fine -- you should just go.

MATT
NOOOOOOOO

(Trip closes the front door.)

(MATT sips his Grace's drink.)